A Day in the Life

A Day in the Life


Rodney Dangerfield. Now there was a venerable comedian I could understand. Specifically, one of his popular jokes really hit home with me, and it has special meaning today. More than most days.


Rodney said, approximately: “When I got up this morning, I picked up my shirt, and a button fell off. I picked up my briefcase, and the handle fell off. I’m afraid to go to the bathroom!"



So, while I'm chuckling about things and, in a tip of my cap to Rodney, I’ll share my day with you. So far. It’s not 3 o’clock yet (as I write this).


Don't be scared. Come along!


Today I … 

  • Took the dog for a walk before sunrise. While I was stopped and talking with a neighbor, I was bitten — by one of Florida’s nasty bugs. And why not? I mean, it’s February, right? Bugs should be everywhere. The bite on the back of my left leg was itchy for hours. I hope there’s no swelling.
  • Stepped on a roofing nail outside. It was huge, rusty, and it embedded itself in my shoe. It did not pierce my foot, thankfully. But it’s been nearly two years since we had our roof redone. Are there any more of these vicious creatures lurking on my back patio?
  • Did a tap dance when I came inside. Well, not exactly. It just sounded like that when I walked across our wooden floor.
  • Broke the toaster. And a handle on it snapped off. The handle nearly went down the garbage disposal. I rescued it right as it was about to plunge into the abyss.
  • Stabbed myself with a knife while I was trying to prepare some food. Oddly, no blood. Just pain. And oh, the flying expletives!
  • Endured the dog’s incessant barking at literally any sound outside. Especially car doors being slammed. He’s never been this, uh, vocal since we got him. Now he’s my buddy, sacked out next to me on the couch. Uh oh! There he goes again.

OK, it’s true. I was able to go to the bathroom, safely … well, for the most part. My T-shirt, of course, has no buttons. I haven’t needed my briefcase in years. 


So thanks for the whimsical memories, Rodney. And thanks for reminding me things could really be “ruff” with my dog:


“Some dog I got, too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid!”  

Comments

  1. AnonymousFebruary 6, 2023 at 6:03 PM

    I love you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 6, 2023 at 6:11 PM

    Days like this make you realize you should just go back to bed -- quickly!

    ReplyDelete
  3. philFebruary 7, 2023 at 9:02 AM

    I think my dog came from the West Virginia area, he was more of a mound builder!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Bill MoutzFebruary 9, 2023 at 2:45 PM

    Very funny. I had a dog called Puddles for that same reason. Lol

    ReplyDelete

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